So this chick had a loyal, hardworking, and loving husband, but because he wasn’t carrying around Excalibur in his pants, she threw away a whole future for some greasy, bottom-tier, fast-food-shaped dude with a third leg and no job prospects.
She really looked at a diamond and said, “Nah, I’d rather roll in a pile of hot garbage.” Like, girl, your IQ must be running on Windows 95.
And the worst part? After she’s used up, discarded, and looking like a clearance item at the thrift store, she’ll come crawling back to the husband like, “Babe, I was confused… I still love you.”
Confused? Nah, you weren’t confused—you were just built for the streets. You chose to throw your entire life away for five minutes of dopamine with a dude who looks like he smells like expired cheese.
Now she’s making budget p0rn videos for dudes who wouldn’t even hold the door open for her, while her ex-husband is out here living his best life, hitting the gym, making money, and getting a real queen.
And when she’s 40, washed up, and hitting dudes with the “where’s all the good men?” speech, the answer is simple:
They were right in front of you, but you traded them for some unemployed ogre with a tripod. Enjoy your permanent L.
So this chick had a loyal, hardworking, and loving husband, but because he wasn’t carrying around Excalibur in his pants, she threw away a whole future for some greasy, bottom-tier, fast-food-shaped dude with a third leg and no job prospects.
She really looked at a diamond and said, “Nah, I’d rather roll in a pile of hot garbage.” Like, girl, your IQ must be running on Windows 95.
And the worst part? After she’s used up, discarded, and looking like a clearance item at the thrift store, she’ll come crawling back to the husband like, “Babe, I was confused… I still love you.”
Confused? Nah, you weren’t confused—you were just built for the streets. You chose to throw your entire life away for five minutes of dopamine with a dude who looks like he smells like expired cheese.
Now she’s making budget p0rn videos for dudes who wouldn’t even hold the door open for her, while her ex-husband is out here living his best life, hitting the gym, making money, and getting a real queen.
And when she’s 40, washed up, and hitting dudes with the “where’s all the good men?” speech, the answer is simple:
They were right in front of you, but you traded them for some unemployed ogre with a tripod. Enjoy your permanent L.